dear drunk dads: it is ok for you to drag your visibly disinterested family to a concert venue, spend the entire time during the concert going back and forth from your seat to get more drinks, being on your phone when you get back, and generally being a distracting shithead, i guess. but where i draw the line is when you get up and do the floppy-arms-over-the-head, spinny-roundy drunk dad dance. that kind of shit is fine at a Grateful Dead concert and nowhere else. have some decorum for crying out loud. signed, the guy you kept bumping into

P.S. if your kids don't hate you yet, tonight will most likely be the beginning of a downward trend.