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New BBQ place opened down the street. Dare I try it for dinner? Cause...even the best BBQ out here is Bill Miller's level back home.

Thanks Apple for my new email signature:

"Please do not reply this message to avoid starting a new interaction."

That's it? That's IT? I need some gochujang, but otherwise, this is super easy to make. Once I fry the chicken, just toss in the sauce and Gochujang Fried Chicken Sammich!

loveandlemons.com/gochujang-sa

I feel like I've stumbled into a Paddington sequel

Don't be mad at UPS workers for suddenly making a fuckton more money than you. Be mad at your employer for not paying YOU that much.

If you want what they now have, JOIN A FUCKING UNION. Expect more of the people who make money off of your work.

it's cute when websites think I would turn off my ad blocker rather than just leaving the page

It’s ok alcohol calories

I can be pretty empty too

HR: You’re going to need to temper your enthusiasm.

Me: My last review you said you wanted more exuberance?

HR: ...but yelling “Fuck Yeah!” every time they announce there is cake in the break room isn’t what we had in mind.

My husband came home without eggs from the farm he's been buying them from because he noticed they put out a "Proud Republicans" sign.

Remember when you never knew how people voted? I do.

The library wants me to return a book I checked out on conquering procrastination. I feel they had fair notice it would be late.

Idea: Super-entity named "Headmaster" that operates out of a school

You would think that they run the place, but actually their power is having complete control over the physical properties and chemical composition of their head

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